Today is Internet Safety Day.
We know that safety is often compromised in abusive relationships. Your calls, messages, activities on social media and search history are examined for any sign of anomalies. This is part of coercive control - you can read our previous post here on the subject.
Our three tips:
It's browser & search (just like google) but it doesn't store your data. takes a little getting used to. Be patient in using it.
2) Cookies #nomore
Remember the story of Handsel and Gretel. How they used cookies to figure their way out of the forest. Cookies leave crumbs of your activity all across the internet.
Cookies are used to Handsel-and-Gretel you from Bing/Yahoo/Google search to Facebook, Instagram and other pages. They track you from your mobile device to your laptop & desktops. Because of how you are signed in to all these devices. Remember how you were looking at menstrual cups and voila! Did Facebook start showing you menstrual cup ads? Creepy and cringe-worthy.
When a site says has cookies & to enable them, don't take the bite/bait. If they don't give you an option to not track you, leave. Delete/disable the cookies in the browser. (Duck-duck-go takes care of this for you)
3) Find an ally NOW!
Find that person who'd be able to help you get out at a moment's notice.
You will see this consistently in all our messaging. Both Suzanne and I had allies who pulled us into safety (physically) from our offenders. If your personal safety is compromised, you need an ally. They can be someone from work or a friend with whom you've not connected with for a long time. You want someone who has compassion (not judgement) and is ready to help out no matter what.
It's been over twenty years since I left my abusive ex. Every year, I thank my allies - who once had to shove me into the janitor's closet. I had to abandon my shoes in the getaway. They found my shoes and brought them back to me.
How you can leverage this post:
1) Share this post with your ally or someone you know who may be in an abusive relationship.
2) For a confidential discussion, please contact me at email@example.com